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T-SHIRTS ARE IN!!!

I have more t-shirts! The cost is $15 and $5 for packaging and shipping if needed. Please let me know if you like one. The money will be put in the "Cure Catherine" account at Wachovia Bank to be used for medical expenses. Thank you in advance for your support.

If you are interested in purchasing a t-shirt, contact me at curecatherine@gmail.com. Please include your name, address, phone number, number of t-shirts, and sizes.

Hello everyone!

I know I know, this is LONG overdue but as you can image this month I have been EXTREMELY busy! That is not a bad thing I am actually having too much fun. I hope I still have some readers out there and no one has giving up on me!

Where to begin? Well I have been out there busy telling my story to anyone and everyone who is willing to listen. At the beginning of October, I spoke at Auburn University to the Zeta Tau Alpha (Gamma Rho) that would my sis's amazing sorority. I first started out in the audience listening what the speakers had to say and to me it was blah blah blah etc. because all they were talking about was important it is to have your grandmother, mother, and aunts checked. I finally got tired of hearing "you should start self breast exams and age 40" I screamed at the top of my lungs I am 22 years old and I have breast cancer". Of course the speaker didn't hear me but an encouraging basketball player came over to me and said she wanted to hear my story not theirs. I told her I could not do it I was not part of the program she give me this look that only a 6'1 Auburn defense could give and that's all I needed. I ran to the Zeta that was in charge and Holley told her that she was an alumni and that was all that president needed to hear and next thing I knew I was standing in font of over 200 people telling my story. As looked into the crowd and notice that the text messaging had stop, the chit chat ceased, and all eyes and ears were on me. Talk about a moment, I knew that basketball player was my angel telling me to start making a difference.

My next big moment was speaking for Alpha Delta Pi and Komen for the Cure; Night out with Breast Cancer. I was the feature speaker and more nervous then Auburn. These were not only my friends but some of the girls out there were cruel to me when I first transfer in and I busted some of there bubbles. The event was opened to all Mercer Sorority's. I knew most of my girlfriends were there and as I was standing in the back I notice one KA, two KAs, three KAs, four. As tears came to my eyes I notice the whole Fraternity came to hear me speak. I kinda had that Sally Field moment, you know "they liked me, they really liked me!' The night ended great with a standing crowd as I exiting the stage again I felt the basketball player's push. I have spoken at little events around town and hoping to speak more places.

I have started radiation and my skin on my left side of my neck and down to my stomach is very tender. I literally bathe in Aloe Vera at night. I go everyday of the week at 2 hoping to finish this by the week before Thanksgiving. My chest looks like my niece got a hold of me with a pink marker with lines and dashes everywhere. I am wearing lots of Brian's old t-shirt because they are the only thing that does hurt me. Sorry if you see me around town and my fashion has changed. Because the radiation is longer then we thought I will not be getting my Christmas wish this year. I asked Santa for nipples and some liposuction, but Dr. Beegle said the skin will not be healed in time to have that surgery. Looks like nipples and liposuction for Valentine's day!

This past weekend I felt like my old self again. I went to KA Cowboy BALL at one of the brother's farm in Dahlongha. Cowboy ball is KA's fall camping trip. For most of you know Catherine does not camp but I made due. I told Brian, I will not sleep in a tent but that you could make me a bed in the back of the Jeep. And that is what he did. With a feather mattress, an egg crate, 2 sleeping bags, 2 blankets, a body pillow, and finally a thick comforter my bed was the warmest bed out there. We had a fire and everyone danced, drank, ate, and laughed. We told old stories to the freshman girls who thought they were sooo cool to be there. At one point I was by myself looking through the fire at everyone and tears came to my eyes because I thought this past February I would never see this again, only seeing this from up above.

This weekend we are walking and some are running in the Komen race. If you would like to come out let me know would love to have you join me!

Well I guess I talked your ear off all for now!

Check the Ta Ta's

Ants are Marching

We have been so busy lately that I need everyone to go to back to work just so I can rest! First off we are back in our home. Thank goodness! I hated that apartment, for those who visited me there knows what I am talking about. Whoever lived there before us was a chain smoker and maintenance could not get the smell out. On top that I am allergic to smoke to you can image how I felt. As everyone knows college football kick off, and I said from the get go that I was not going to let anything get in between my Auburn Football Season or as mom puts says, "its ball season people". I have gone to Auburn for the past 2 weekends and tailgated yes, in the heat and I felt like I was home. To me the greatest feeling in the world is to surrounded by the best family anyone could ask for and the land filled with orange and blue! My extended family comes from all over, GA, SC, and AL. I enjoyed seeing everyone in person and updating them on whats been going on. I have not made it in to the game yet simply because my back still hurts. I am hoping my back will be better for LSU or UGA.

Holley and Cookie came home with us last week and stayed to help me unpack and take me to my oncologist last Friday. That was the first time I had seen Dr. Jones since my surgery. She was very pleased of how I looked and the results of my pathology report. Here is what it said, I had 12 lymph nodes removed with cancer in 4 of them. In the others, I had some alternating cells (which could one day turn into cancer) but she said it was the report I could have received. because of the nodes I will have 6 weeks of radiation. I go next week to meet Dr. Simpson and view how it will be done. Dr. Jones said the left side of my chest will look like a treasure map. You can image that jokes Brian and my sister came up with to that comment! Dr. Beegle wants me to complete radiation before he finishes the reconstruction surgery. My left breast is healed great the right is still pretty pissed off. I was joking with one of friends from SC, Michelle, can you image a breast being pissed off!!! I am hoping it will realize that I had to do what was best for it!

Speaking of my chest do I have a funny story. Since all this rain we have been having because of the hurricanes we have had an ant problem. My dad makes an appointment for the bug man to come on Friday at 11 am. That morning Cookie woke me up and I jump in the shower to get ready for my Dr's. appointment now when I got out of the shower I was getting ready. Here's the scene: My bedroom door was closed, lights and T.V. on my bathroom door (which is inside my bedroom) was open. I had just put on my pants with no top or hair. I get this cell phone call from sis downstairs saying that the bug man was here, before she could finish her statement I had turned around to see this old big bug man just looking at my bare chest. I said yes, sis I know. I looked at him and said excuse just one second and shut my bathroom door. I could I do but just laugh. I had just flashed the bug man my nipple less, nasty looking chest. through the doors I could hear "Uh Uh I am just here to spray the ants, your dad called about the ants". I opened the doors to show him where the ants were and on top of that my blinds fell on my left arm cutting me and breaking several pictures and my 21st birthday wine glass ( I was a little upset). I screamed because of my scare of Lymphademia in the left arm. The bug man was now sweating from head to toe. Holley showed him where the ants were on the window and I am trying to call dad freaking out that the window crew did not install my blinds right and that my arm will become a balloon...my dad so calming says "accidents happens". That was not good enough for me! In the meantime, my paw-paw of a bug man yells at the top of the stairs that he was going to spray outside and he would put the checkout sheet on the counter, no need for a signature! Holley and I just laughed and said OK thank you! I am sure he had seen all he could see for day. I had notice he wore a nausea patch like I did with chemo and it was behind his ear...lets just say it was at his neck by the time he left! I called one of my best friend named Caroline (she is a nurse) freaking out about what to do with my arm she laughed at the problem and calmed me down and told me my arm was fine and that I was going to the Dr. in an hour. Dr. Jones said I was fine but she had never laughed so hard!

Point to story..if you are going to visit with me PLEASE CALL or KNOCK on my door, thanks.

Last week I also had the chance to finally meet Bruce Goddard. He wrote an article on me back in the spring and he wanted to follow-up and see how I was doing. We told funny stories and he told me of the people that really read this thing. Which I really had no idea just how many people read this thing. I enjoy reading his blogs and don't mind seeing myself on there.

Talk to you soon!

Check the Ta's Ta's

Home

Hello everyone its really me this time. Its 4:22 am I can't sleep. That seems to be the problem lately I can not get comfortable enough to sleep....so I don't. First off, please let me say this with hurting anyone feelings but I created this blog for me to vent and write what I am feeling and to keep you guys posted. Please understand that my family and I really do have life's and cannot or have time to always update it. Also, there are just some days were I really do nothing but play on facebook! I really can't believe how many people read and keep up with me! Thanks to everyone for your support.

Now how am doing? Well I still the drains, I now down to 4 (came home with 6). They are a pain and I can't get comfortable in any position. I am extremely sore all over and sadly just ran out of pain meds. If I try to lay down I feel like everything is in my throat. I am just tried of being in pain and just want this all over. My right breast is mad that it got cut off and is still miss behaving. It likes to bleed and not heal fast enough. My left is healing great!

My hair slowing coming back and looks like I am going to have my mom's natural dark colored hair. I guess God wanted me to look like my dad before and my mom after! Brian say that's what the bottle is for! It happened, my eyebrows and eyelashes have fallen off, and lucky for me my aunt got the makeup and eyelashes to replace the real ones. Because of the stress I have the dark circles under my eyes. Mom and Brian say the weight is coming off, of course I can't see it but I did notice my face is coming down (thank goodness).

Today, Mom and I are heading to the Doctors for a check-up and hoping to get the drains out. To pass the time off I have literally looked at every wedding and bridesmaid's dress out there online! I have picked the dresses for the 12 girls and I think I have found mine! I know, I know, I said 12 bridesmaids don't pick..you had your wedding and this is mine. I can't image not having them by my side on that special day! So basically I have everything planned and its a year and half out. Nothing like being prepared!

While I was in the hospital we found out real fast that sis is expecting #2! Mom called her out when she was throwing up the morning after my surgery and didn't get there till half the day was gone! I was on so many drugs I kept trying to get the nurses to give her a test! Baby Stejskal is due to meet us April 5. Around its daddy birthday! So 2009 will be a big year for us.

Check the Ta's Ta's

Just Haven't Had Enough

Welcome once again to all, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, little children, dogs and cats; this is Brian coming to you once more from Northside Hospital with another update on our heroine, Catherine. Unfortunately, I must report that yesterday's initial plans for dismissal from the hospital have not gone exactly as planned. Since Catherine's surgery on Tuesday morning, some of her blood work has been slowly becoming more negative. She has been showing low blood pressure, a drop in her hemoglobin and iron counts, as well as having some swelling in her arms and around the reconstruction site (that's the breast area, not the house, which is in the process of reconstruction following the tornado and I believe is really started to cause all of our tolerance levels to swell).

Catherine's plastic surgeon, Dr. Philip Beegle, came in this morning for his regular rounds check-in, and due specifically to Catherine's low blood pressure and her fainting spell early yesterday afternoon, he has decided to give her a couple of units of blood through a transfusion. Now of course, given Catherine's squeamish nature toward blood and blood related accessories, this sat about as well with her as the gas prices do with a Hummer owner. She was intent on the blood transfusion coming from someone in the family, but after a bit of discussion with her about the timetable that would be required for someone in the family to have their blood drawn, tested and refined, as well as the fact that blood transfusion safety is far more advanced that it was in the past ("Catherine, you are not going to get cancer or AIDS from a blood transfusion; you've got a better chance of winning the lottery and you don't even play."). So Catherine is scheduled to be the proud new recipient of two units of blood. This will require about 6 hours, after which Catherine's vitals are expected to tremendously improve and we will know a bit more about her dismissal, but we sit in a kind of purgatory, hospital room limbo at this point, going on a day-to-day basis.

Last night, for dinner, Catherine and I had Milano's Pizza and Subs, which was absolutely delicious; she had ravioli Florentine and I had the carne lasagna, however, they still owe me her Greek salad and, though the potato skins were delicious, they would have been far more enjoyable had we received the honey mustard I requested, but I'm not bitter. Regardless, we will continue to press forward; I must return to Macon this evening for school tomorrow and the hotel will get a bit more money out of the family. We are all still trying to enjoy ourselves, and Catherine being Catherine continues to make me laugh both inside and out. The nursing staff at Northside has been fantastic and I would recommend them to anyone making a visit to a hospital in the Atlanta area.

Because this blog has been so amazing for Catherine and I, and the entire family, letting us express ourselves and truly letting us feel the love, support and prayers of so many of our friends and family, I would like to ask for some prayers for someone else in the family: Aunt Sharon's husband, JP Smith, has been having a truly rough time recently since their return from their summer vacation to Santa Belle. He had a hernia operation about a year ago, but since their return home, JP has spent a great deal of time in the hospital and had to be re-admitted on Friday because, since returning home, he has had to have exploratory surgery to check the repair work of the previous hernia operation, yet he has continued to be in pain and has not been able to hold down a any chow. If you could just stick his name in with your prayers on this Sunday, I know that he would feel the Lord's hand upon him and his health. This blog has really shown me the power of prayer first hand and I know that it is the greatest medical tool we have.

Hopefully, the blog will return to its original nature in the near future, chocked full of ridiculous antics from Catherine, myself and all our friends and families. We hope that you will stay tuned for more updates.

Check the TaTa's. If you don't want to take our word for it, ask Christina Applegate. This entry is outrageous in its own nature; I must stop typing now. Fiance, out.

Brian
The Fiance and Olympics Coverage Addict (Go U.S.A.!)

Elvis is in the Process of Leaving the Building

Hello again; this is Brian, the fiance, coming to you once again from the beautiful Northside Hospital in glorious Sandy Springs, Georgia. Just wanting to check in with everyone, giving you an update on our girl, Catherine, and her progression following Tuesday's surgery.

Catherine is currently scheduled for the latest possible check-out time this evening, just before midnight. She, unfortunately, has being doing everything that she possibly can to get out of these plans. Early this morning, while trying to take a shower with the assistance of a nurse tech, became light-headed in the heat of the shower while trying to sit down in the shower chair, and had to be helped back into a wheelchair, and then the bed. After this development, she became to run a temperature, started to feel nauseous, had to be taken down to radiology for a chest X-ray, and had a Battle-Royale type run-in with some of the nurses over her port. When the initial lab technician came in to take a blood sample from Catherine, Catherine "politely" told her to leave because she would only allow them to take blood from the port, which would need to be re-accessed. Then, the lab technician who accessed her port on Tuesday morning prior to the surgery came in to try and access the port, but unsuccessfully, and Catherine had just about had enough of the people in the scrub-uniforms for the day. Finally, two of the lab technicians were able to get the port accessed and the blood drawn so, as far as we know, we are still on schedule for tonight's departure from this hospital visit.

Well, Catherine is doing much better and, unless something major appears in the blood work or chest X-ray, we should be bringing Catherine on home this evening. She will need to return here, to Atlanta, around the middle of next week to have her drains removed, but it appears that everything is going as planned. Please keep reading the blog, leaving Catherine posts on here and Facebook, and continue to keep her in your thoughts and prayers. I am starting to feel like she is like the female version of the bionic or 6-million dollar men, ya know, "We can rebuild her, we can make her better..."

Well, I think I am going to take Catherine for a lap around the floor; thanks for playing along with us so far, and please keep up those thoughts and prayers. We constantly feel so uplifted by them.

The TaTa's ... yeah, you need to check 'em. Don't forget. B, out.

Brian
The Fiance
Guest Blog Writer and the Source of Most of Catherine's Anger & Embarassment

Continuing to do well!

Hello everyone! Sorry for no update yesterday.

Spoke with Brian, Catherine is continuing to do incredibly well. Yesterday she moved to a bigger room and walked from the old room to the new one. She also spent most of the day sitting in a chair and talking with visitors. Catherine also walked a couple of laps around the floor with family members. This is pretty incredible only one day out from serious surgery!

I will be heading up to ATL this evening to visit Catherine. I will update more tomorrow.

Today is Brian's first day back in the classroom, pray for him as he gets his new students and has to worry about both school and Catherine. He will be going back up with me tonight to visit.

Keep praying and check the Ta-tas!

Sarah Mac

The kid is a fighter ladies and gents. . .

Hello Hello!

Part three in today's updates:

Catherine is feeling GREAT thanks to her good friends Morphine and Valium. Spoke to Brian and Ms. Pam and the report is that our girl is looking good and feeling good. In the words of the infamous Catherine Carswell (and her friend Valium), "I'm skinny Sarah MacConnell, I'm skinny. . .They gave me drugs." Oh she will hate this blog post. :) I mean it is called "The Funnier Side of Cancer."

Anyhow, she is doing quite well all things considering. She is able to get flowers at the hospital and loves visitors. She will be at the hospital for a while, not sure of a discharge date yet. Continue to check here for updates!

Catherine and family thank everybody for their prayers today! Keep them up throughout her recovery!

Sarah Mac
Guest Blogger
(soon to probably be ex Maid of Honor based on embarrassing blog postings. . . love ya Catherine!)

She's Outta There!

Sarah had a meeting to go to until later on this afternoon, but I wanted to get everyone up to speed. Our girl went in this morning with a stuborness and resolve only Catherine truly possesses. She went with Ms. Pam back into the pre-surgery area around 5:50am with the surgery starting a little behind schedule around 7:30am. We got to speak with Dr. Beegle's nurse practicioner this morning before hand and she was FANTASTIC! Very re-assuring and extremely calming. We saw Dr. Amerson when she came out around 9:30am to tell us that Catherine was doing great; they had removed the lump, along with 3 of the lymph nodes from below her left arm that showed signs of infection. She also said that Dr. Beegle was already in the process of reconstruction when she finished her end of the bargain; Dr. Beegle came out to speak with us a little after 12 noon. He said that Catherine was doing quite well and would be in the recovery room for about an hour, at the most two. Once she leaves recovery, they will take her up to her room and we will be able to see her at that time. It was truly a blessed morning!



Thank you all so much for the thoughts, and more importantly for the numerous prayers too great to attempt to count. We are truly blessed to have such wonderful friends and family. Many folks have come to spend the morning with the family: my parents, Mr. Lee and Ms. Pam, Holley, Mickey Morring, Ms. Cay Kite, Kimberly and Caroline Darnell, my pastor from home, Brother Doug, and Uncle John and LeeAnn Brewer also had an opportunity to stop in for a bit. For those who did not have the finances allicated in this month's gasoline budget to be able to come today, thank you so much for your gracious words of encouragement and support, as well and the many prayers and thoughts; YA'LL ROCK!

Alright, well Aunt Karen and Mary Elizabeth are here now and its lunchtime, so I am going to do my grub thing for a little while longer in the "holding cell." Fiance, out

Don't forget about those TaTa's; they do need a good checkin'.

Brian

Off she goes. . .

Catherine went back into surgery this morning at about 5:50. The nurse practitioner came and spoke to the Carswells at about 6:45 and said she expected the surgery to last until around noon or so. Will be back later with another update.

Pray for Catherine this morning as she is back in surgery and pray for the Carswells and Brian as they wait at the hospital.

Check the ta-tas!

Sarah Mac

We Have Arrived!

First off, many thanks to Sarah for getting the post out earlier today to let everyone know about the current progression of things. And so many more thanks go out to those of you who are thinking about, concerned about and praying for Catherine. Given that I did not just say, "praying for me," it is obvious that your "pen pal" for the moment is again, the fiance, B. We hope that everyone is doing well and having a beautiful Monday.

We are now in Atlanta and I am writing this from my hotel room in north Atlanta across from Northside Hospital, where Catherine will be having her operation tomorrow morning at 7:30am. We arrived here this afternoon for Catherine to complete some pre-op procedures and are looking for to this long and arduous journey drawing to a close of another chapter. Thank you again to everyone who has done so much for Catherine and me during these last months; there is no way that we could have done it by ourselves.

A little aside of comedy: while coming out of the hospital from this afternoon's procedures, Catherine and Ma Pam ran into none other than Atlanta's own Usher. You believe that, Usher. Somebody call the tabloids and TMZ, Entertainment Tonight, call somebody. Apparently his wife just gave birth today and, while he was "sneaking" in the back part of the hospital, he walked right by Catherine and Ms. Pam in the Breast Care ward. To validate our siting, we took a picture of his four-door Bentley (which oddly enough, was parking in front of the hospital next to one of the very direct "NO PARKING ZONE" signs). They did not get a chance to really speak to him because he was moving through the hospital quite quickly and was on his cell phone, but we can assure you, we did see him.

We are off to dinner right now, but please continue with the thoughts and prayers. We will try to continue to let you know about updates as they occur, and Sarah will also be updating the blog again tomorrow.

Don't forget about those TaTa's; check 'em early, check 'em often.

GO CATHERINE!

Off to Atlanta. . .

Hey everyone! This is Catherine's friend (and trusty maid of honor) Sarah Mac signing on to give you an update about Catherine. The Carswells will be heading up to ATL this afternoon to pre-op for tomorrow's surgery. I will be updating the blog tomorrow and throughout the rest of this week's recovery in ATL.

Please come to the blog for updates on Catherine. As you can imagine today is a stressful day and there is a lot to get done. Catherine told me to let you know that most likely she will not be answering her phone for a while. She appreciates all of your concerns and well wishes, but asks that you please post a comment on the blog or a wall post/message on her Facebook. All of her blog comments and facebook stuff will be printed for her to read in the hospital. Also, in order for her family and Brian to focus on their girl, they may not be answering their phones often this week either. Most likely they will not have signal in the hospital anyway or be allowed to use their cell phones. Again, I will be posting updates here for all of you! Please feel free to leave comments for Catherine and the whole Carswell clan.

Catherine and her family thank you so much for all of your thoughts and prayers. Cat will be going into surgery tomorrow morning. Look for more from me tomorrow.

Keep on praying and check the ta-tas!

Sarah Mac
Guest Blogger Extraordinaire

Girls are staying in!

Just wanted to let everyone know that the ovaries are staying in! We are leaving NYC soon headed home. I'll write more when we get home! Thanks for the prayers and support!

Check the Ta's Ta's

This is it!

Hello everyone!

Exciting news, today is my VERY LAST CHEMO!!!!! I am very happy, over-joyed, and cannot sleep! This means everything will start going again and I can finally start looking and feeling like my old self once more!!! The house is quiet with my family asleep; Brian is gone to return a movie at Blockbuster, so I am awaiting his return and I thought I would update everyone on the latest. I, as usual, do not sleep the nights before chemo. I guess its because I am anxious or nervous about the treatment, or maybe what my doctor might say or find.

I have lots of questions for Dr. Jones about what will happen next? Does this mean its over, just like that? I spent 5 months of hell going through chemo....taking the worst medicines in the world, losing my beautiful long blonde hair, gaining weight to where my dogs don't recognize me, and now thats it. Now I must wait for NYC for a another Dr. (which the total amount of Doctors to 7) to tell us that my ovaries may or may not come out on my up coming surgery. I am scared to death of the visit.

I plan to make tomorrow's chemo treatment a fun one. Brian's parents are coming in town to join us and Holley (sister) and Catie Beth (neice) are in town so she can spend the last treatment with me. (Scott had to work but like the brother-in-law he is, he will come down on Friday. He has always been there for me since the 7th grade!) Joana (friend since high school and singing in the wedding), and Liz, if she makes back in time (she is also a friend since middle school and bridesmaid) have both made plans to come tomorrow. Then there will be the usual clan of Brian, Mom, Haley (my best friend since high school and a bridesmaid), and then I have my "pop ins" - friends that come in on their lunch breaks. I am scared I will have too many people and the chemo nurses will get mad at me! I know it will be crazy tomorrow because of the 4th; they bump everyone up a day so I know it will be packed out!

Enough about tomorrow; how about an update on NYC? We do have plane tickets and a place to stay. Thank you to everyone who gave suggestions or offered their accomodations. I am looking forward to spending my mom's birthday with her in NYC. I am only hoping I can give her the best birthday ever! She and Brian have never been, so I know this will be fun for them. I am also excited to see my friends that are living in New York! Hey Mary Katherine and Katie!

Well now that I have filled in some stuff that has been going on I am off to watch Little Miss Sunshine! I will have Brian write tomorrow to let everyone know how my last treatment goes!

P.S. I love the comments! (This post has been verified for grammatical errors by Brian).

Check the Ta's Ta's

First off, sorry for being MIA these past 2 months. To be honest, I have not felt well lately. May was really difficult because I had 2 chemo's in the same month. I was basically out of it and now, in June, its hitting me that its summer and I can't do my normal activities I do this time of year. Summer is one of my favorite times of year. I loved being on the lake, in the sun, getting a tan, and enjoying being outside. Unfortunately, that can happen right now.

The physical part of this is really getting to me now. I look at myself in the mirror and see someone different than what I saw last summer. I AM HUGE. I know, I know, the weight will come off when I have my surgery, but I am tired of people telling me that I look great. I can't fit into any of my clothes anymore and this is the largest I have ever been. It is because of all the chemo and medicine I am taking. My doctor did tell me that I will gain weight each time I go. I have talked to other Breast Cancer Survivors and they tell me they gained weight too. People don't realize what I see everyday. I wake up with no hair, the moon round face, and I kid Brian saying I am like the old Reebok's pump tennis shoes. Every time I go, they pump me up more!

Some good news; I have my 5th chemo treatment tomorrow, which means after this one, I only have one more to go! That will be a huge party come July 4th!

This week, I received a call from Memorial Sloan-Kettering in New York City and I, along with my family, will be making a trip to the Big Apple soon. I am meeting a GYN-Oncologist . My doctors want to take my ovaries during my surgery on August 5th. I think this is another reason I have been so sick lately - just worrying about all this. I told my mom and Brian the other night they can always replace your breast, but once the ovaries go... its no babies for me. I am 22 now and the thought of not having biological children is a really tough thought for me. Hopefully this doctor can and will give me some different options.

I know this trip will be stressful just because it is expensive and hard for my parents (my dad is already flipping out!) In my opinion, the only people that truly need to go would be Brian and me because this is OUR future here and I am scared he can't afford an airline ticket because of the gas prices and plane tickets are so high! Even hotels up there are ridiculous! Holley and I have been looking at hotels all day and nothing under $300! If anyone has any advice, please let me know! Because of this stress, I have made myself really sick this week. I had a runny nose, sneezing, coughing, and I vomited once. I even had a panic attack on Sunday.

I have tried to plan some wedding things, but I really have not been up to it. I can't wait for all this to be over!

We are still selling T-shirts. Please e-mail me your address because I have had people to request one and no way of getting in touch with you guys! They are still $15 if you can pick them up, but if I need to mail it, please add $3 dollars for shipping (I shipped some last week and it was $20!).

Thanks again to all the people that have asked about me - I really do appreciate the prayers and concerns! Again, sorry for being MIA! I hope that this entry is a little easier to read and follow, I asked Brian to check it for grammatical/spelling errors (this is Brian typing from this point forward - Cate-Lee would never admit that she got me to do this, so it'll be our little secret).

And if you might be saying a little prayer, here are a few more broad range thoughts for you - our Macon community and those still dealing with the Mother's Day storms, our troops, the upcoming election and the future of our country. We've got plenty of things to be praying for, but there are always more things for which to be thankful. We hope this finds you and yours happy, safe and enjoying your summer.

Don't forget about those Ta-Ta's; check 'em early and often.

Oops, I Sorry!

Sorry for the delay in publication all, but I know you will all be happy to see another update in the life of our heroine, Catherine Carswell (18 months to be Aplin). Having read this opening line, you all must have realized that it is I, the fiance, writing to you once again. I obviously have fallen short on my duties by not updating our public sooner; hence, the title of this post. Catherine has been dealing with a serious bit of arthritic stiffness and pain since her last chemo treatment on May 22nd. At this moment, she is entertaining Catie Beth (Holley & Scott's little girl). I must tell you that if you have not had the pleasure of meeting the Cookie Monster, you are truly missing out folks. This little girl is a bundle of ridiculousness. She refers to herself constantly in the 3rd person and reminds me of a professional wrestler ("Do you smell what the Catie Beth is cooking!?") Before dinner this evening, as I was bringing her in the house from being on the back porch, she told Granger, "No Ganger, I go inside! Bye bye, Ganger; I see you later!" It's a riot, people - when she wants me to pick her up, its, "B hold to!" & her command for getting down is, "No, I do it!"

So, what has happened as of late in the life & times of Catherine Lee Carsell to be Aplin (my god, what a name). Since Relay for Life has completed for this year, I am happy to announce that the Team Cure Catherine raised over $2000 to put towards cancer research and the ACS. Other big events to discuss in this issue - we do our best Wizard of Oz rendition, making plans, a trip to Atlanta, chemotherapy #4 & meeting the surgeon, Gigi & B finish the school year and Holley, Scott & the Cookie Monster come to town. Here's how it all went down.

The week following our engagement at Relay, Catherine stayed busy with talking to everyone in the world who would listen and ask to see the ring. We spent the latter part of that week getting ready for Mother's Day, but it would become a far more memorable day than expected. Around 4:30am on Mother's Day, Catherine was awakened by an automated text message from the Mercer Mobile system (which sends phone messages to Mercer students - a plan enstated following the Virginia Tech tragedy). The message said basically that severe weather was in the area and that all students should seek shelter in the bottom floors of their residence halls. Intrigued, Cate Lee turned on the TV to WMAZ as Ben Jones was saying that tornadoes had been spotted around the intersection of Bass & Rivoli and another around River Crossing. A few minutes later he began to say that a tornado had touched down in Lizella at which time our power promptly went out. Catherine, becoming extremely terrified at the thoughts of tornado, came to my room to awaken me and then we went downstairs to get Bubba & Gigi. As we all got into the downstairs bathroom, we began to hear torrents of water hitting the front side of the house, which faces toward Lizella and the lake. After a few short minutes of our sand castle in the surf experience, we began to hear the proverbial freight train sound (I thought it sounded more like the hum of a machine in a mill or, as suggested by Mr. Lee, a jet engine). As Catherine & Ms. Pam were complaining of the pressure causing their ears to pop, and Catherine frantically tried to get me to let the dogs out of the laundry room so that I could put both of them in the hall closet with me, Mr. Lee & I began to move toward the front door to see what we could see.

By the time we actually got outside, what we found was pure reckage. A major pine tree in the backyard had snapped and fallen across the fence in the rear of the property, crushing some maple trees and the fence, Granger's pen was under about 1/2 of another pine, which had been topped around 20 ft. up and a barrage of other trees and debris were scattered around the house. As we moved to the front yard, we found more damage throughout the neighborhood. Now that things are starting to get back to normal, if you drive around the west side of town and the lake, you can see just how much damage was done. We lost approximately 27 trees in the storm, and the next neighborhood over (Pineworth) has several homes that are in a state of un-repairability (I know this is not a word - sew me! I'm the teacher, not you.)

The other unexpected part of the tornado meant some serious damage to the rear of Westside. This meant finding a new location for the remainder of the school year. Thus, I got to spend the last 2 weeks of the school year in the land of Rut a.k.a. Rutland Middle and High Schools. We spent the remaining days of the school year alternating classroom days with the Rutland students - I must tell you, that has got to be the most awkward end to a school year that any community has ever experienced. But many thanks go out to the people of the school board and Rutland Middle and High Schools for their gracious hospitality.

Since that time, Catherine and I have begun our wedding plans - here are the best laid plans, thus far. We are to be married on November 21, 2009 at 7:00 in the evening at Martha Bowman UMC. Catherine has decided on the magic number of 13 bride attendants - I had to come up with 13 friends to keep from hiring somebody off the corner. Catherine will have Holley as her maid of honor and my dad will get the honors for me (sorry Chip, you're still my boy, but you're stunned! HA!) A note: if you are reading the previous paranthesized (another non-word) statement and are slightly confused, not to worry - its between brothers. Of course, Delaney Holliman Studios and Stephanie Lynn will be taking all sorts of kinda photos - they gonna take our picture!

Transitioning well into the next update, last Monday we traveled up to Breast Care Specialists at Northside Hospital in Atlanta to visit Dr. Amerson, Catherine's surgical oncologist. We spent most of the ride there and back discussing some of our wedding plans with Ma Pam preciding in the backseat (I was informed previously that I must be involved in the transportation to Atlanta on this trip because Catherine & Ms. Pam got lost on the last trip - Catherine is in love with my navigation system in the Jeep, but she doesn't like that I listen to my navigation ladies' voice, at times, more readily than I do Catherine. After getting to the doctor's office I waited outside in the 1st of many waiting rooms with Catherine and Ma Pam to move on to the next one. As I was making my way through the USA Today crossword, we were called to the next waiting room &, after making our way in and just barely getting comfortable, one of the staff members comes into the waiting area and announces to the entire room, "Males are NOT allowed in this waiting room for the comfort and ease of our female patients." As I then proceed to look around the room, I realize that I am the only MALE in the room. I look at her to reply, "You mean me?!" and she just gives me one of those, "You're an idiot" faces. I mean, honestly, why in the flipping French fiddle farts (notice the alliteration) did she not just come over to me privately and say something like, "Sweetie, could you please remain in the other waiting room until your party gets into their examination room?" Thanks for calling me out, woman. Another note: if you are a male, do NOT go to Breast Care Specialists in Atlanta for any reason. That place has a serious ball-busting, She-Man, feminism-at-its-finest vibe going on. The odor of estrogen is so strong in there that they wouldn't even allow a guy with breast cancer in the office to get into the 2nd waiting room. And for all the Seinfeld fans - the best part about it; the guy's last name was Castanza. HA! Those Castanza's always have the worst luck.

Any who, after the doctor, we stopped by the Cheesecake Factory and low and behold, guess who is sitting at the table no more than 5 feet from us - Delaney Holliman and Stephanie Lynn! What a coincidence.

Since that time, we made it home, Ma Pam and I finished out the 2007-2008 school year (good luck and good riddance - just kidding), and Scott, Holley and the queen of 3rd person speak, Catie Beth, came to town on Friday. Scott and I played speed golf on Saturday out at Fox Run Country Club at Barrington Hall before I had graduation that night. My parents, Matt & Renee, and Aunt Sharon & the JPster came over Sunday afternoon for a big ol family eatin' meetin' with some delicious fried chicken served up by our very own Gigi, then Scott and I played golf again on Monday morning. The only problem with having more time to play on Monday morning was that I couldn't get out of the round fast enough - I was worthless with a golf club in my hand and Scott smacked me by 5 strokes. You better believe I will get him next time and, oh by the way, don't ever play UNO with anybody in this family. I thought I was on the inside but they will turn on you and cheat to win in a heartbeat. I swear they rig the deck or somebody has some base-dealing skills that I was unaware of until recently. Back to the point, Holley and Catie Beth decided to stay through Friday morning for Catherine's appointment with her plastic surgeon, Dr. Beagle (I wonder if he likes chasing foxes), which brings me back to now - Bubba & Gigi off to bed, Catie Beth checked out a few hours ago, Holley, Catherine, Sarah & I took a late night trip to Target and Sonic and now I am ready to call it a night. I hope you have enjoyed your time reading - I know I certainly have enjoyed my time typing. See ya'll back here next time - same breast time, same breast channel (I think that's how it goes).

Don't forget about those TaTa's - Check 'em early, check 'em often. Peace, Love and Chicken everybody.

B out!

He Got Mine at Satterfield & Dempsey a.k.a. HE FINALLY DID IT!!!

Well family & friends, its time for a guest appearance for yours truly once again - that's right, its time for 'ol B to have some blog writing time. Sorry to disappoint with a less melodramatic and a hopefully downsized level of grammatical errors as can be normally expected from our speed-typing heroine; I hope that my writing style doesn't make you want to check back another day for one of Cat-Cat's posts.

So, as you can see from the title of this entry, the picture to the right, possibly the news Friday night or the possible spreading of the word on the street, I FINALLY DID IT (for some reason, I do not believe that Catherine ever thought it would happen). And being that such a momentous occasion has taken place, Catherine wanted all the details up on the blog for everyone to see, but unfortunately I have worn her slap out since yesterday evening with all this excitement. Here’s how it happened.

Yesterday afternoon, I left school around 3:30pm taking two of my students home after a Friday detention and when I was done, I called back over to the house to see what Catherine and my future mother-in-law, Gigi (Ms. Pam) were up to. Ms. Pam said that she was waiting to wake Catherine up from a nap, some very valuable rest that came in handy last night. So I decided that, with Catherine’s patented “Brian Radar” temporarily deactivated, I would take a stroll down to Warner Robins to check out Satterfield and Dempsey Jewelers. While on the way, I thought to call Stephanie Lynn (Catherine’s fantastic photographer from Delaney Holliman’s studio who is documenting Cat’s journey). I asked her if, at the time that I finally decided to pop the question, she would be there hiding silently to record the whole thing and she was immediately on board for a little bit of inside information.

Well, when I got to Satterfield and Dempsey, I met Sam Satterfield himself and sat down with him for a bit to look at several rings by A. Jaffe. As we were looking at some things, some good, some maybe, some not so much, I still had not seen anything that truly caught my eye until, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a ring toward the right side of the case and I said, “That one!” As soon as it came out of the display, I knew that was the one for Catherine. So after a little bit of heckling and finagling (not really) and some discussion about making a matching band, I wrote the most important check of my entire life (if you don’t believe so, you should break into my bank records and see the memo line it the check – I even wrote it down for the non-believers). With it bagged, boxed and back in the car, I rushed back to I-75 as we were scheduled to be arriving at Relay for Life in only 20 minutes.

During the car ride home, I called my dad just to talk and to tell him what was going on. If you have never met my dad before, he is one of the most amazing men on the entire planet and I really look up to him for everything that he has done in my life and in the lives of so many people – that is why I asked to stand next to me on that altar and be my best man. Well while I am trying to talk to him and drive, Catherine has begun blowing up my phone with missed calls, mean messages and ALL CAPS TEXTS (adds emphasis, like I would hurry more because of capitalization?!). Well, when I get home, Catherine is waiting at the door, and I have to rush inside to change clothes and get on over to Sandy Beach park for Relay.

As I was driving back home with my knees, eating my lunch I never got to, drinking a sip if Sprite, clearing Catherine’s calls and talking to my dad, the thought occurred to me to change my original proposal plan and do the whole thing that night in front of friends, family and film crew (my alliteration skills seem almost uncanny tonight; why do these words keep coming to me in such a manner?) This whole week was just tremendous for our girl and she loved every minute of feeling rested, relatively normal and being the center of the media’s attention, but I knew that I could not cap this week off in the way I was devising without first talking to Bubba (Mr. Lee – I called him Mr. Lee when I asked – gotta be proper so as to keep him from body slamming me on the Relay track). So being rushed out the door to the Relay by Cat-Cat and Gigi seemed to spell A-I-N’T / G-O-N-N-A / H-A-P-P-E-N (I’m not quite as good as Aretha Franklin).

Well, we get on over to the Relay camp, which is only a short distance from the house and Catherine, in a pink & blue color scheme and me at her side to carry her most effeminate flowery purse, fell right into her role as Superstar Survivor. About 15 minutes after we got parked and into the tent areas for the school system, Weaver and the “Cure Catherine” girls, Bubba showed up and I started looking for my opportunity. When I saw the first available time when we were separated from everyone else and Catherine and Ms. Pam were distracted, I asked when might be a good time to talk to him. When he said, “How about Sunday afternoon?,” I was far short of having (as Uncle Lee would tell you that he is glad I had) the balls to say, “Well how about right now?” Shortly after that, another chance was presented so I gave my self a quick pep talk, said some prayers, swallowed my stomach full of nerves, checked my crotch to see if I met requirements (this is me being facetious, by the way) and asked Mr. Lee right then and there. After explaining the plan a bit more and the situation’s amazingly fast progression since this afternoon, he said “Yes” to the 3rd most important question I’ve ever asked (1st was asking for my salvation and the second comes up shortly).

Next, I went and told Stephanie and Claire Simms (phenomenal reporter from ABC Macon who did this week’s mini-series on Catherine) NOT to leave for any reason and snuck away from the crowd to head back to the Jeep for that little black box (not the thing from a plane crash, the one with the ring inside – speaking of which, if the black box is what always survives a plane crash, why don’t they just make the whole plane out of that stuff?). Once back at the tent, I managed, after a ridiculously difficult wait, to get Catherine away from the crowd. I walked her across the Relay track, but someone on that side started talking to her again. So I headed back towards where he originally started and as we crossed the track, I told Catherine how proud of her I was for how far she has come and how well I know that she is going to do after seeing just how well she did with the first half of her chemotherapy treatments. Then I told her how much I loved her and, as I tried to fight back the tears and all the distractions, I told her that I was going to get down on one knee, take a box with a ring inside from my pocket, hold her left hand and wait for her to say yes to this question...”Catherine Lee Carswell, will you marry me?” As you can see from above, she said yes, a barrage of photo-taking, filming, hugging, hand-shaking and congratulating ensued and we spent the rest of the night at the Relay being the topic of many discussions. I even saw some of my students from Westside and got to introduce them to Catherine for the first time.

When we got home, we turned on the 11:00pm ABC Macon news to watch the last segment in the mini-series and when the segmented finished, the anchor looked into the screen to say, “And with a bit of breaking news in Catherine’s story, Brian proposed tonight while at Relay for Life and the good news is that Catherine said yes.” By god man, she better have said yes. And so, the week drew to a close and we both finished the day with a new Facebook relationship status.

We are waiting on date decisions until we discuss recovery time with the doctors and surgeons a bit more, but you will always have the most up-to-date information, right here, on Catherine’s blog. Well ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, little children, dogs and cats. This will close out another segment of my guest appearance writing; I apologize for such a long entry but I know there are people out there (ahhm, ahhm, cough, couch, my momma) who want to hear all the sappy details. We love you all and thanks for reading.

Check the Ta-Tas (or have someone else – like a certified medical professional, for those with dirty minds – do it for ya). Peace, Love, Chicken and I am Dundee like the Crocodile Paul Hogan.

B (Brian “the fiancé” Aplin)

"You are the Hannah Montana of Cancer"...thanks Eason

My trip to Knoxville was fun and the wedding was beautiful. It was good change in scenery. I was really nervous about going to the wedding because it was the first time I have worn my wig "out in public" as no one knew my story what was going on. I feared people might say something about me or point fingers. I didn't see anyone doing that but it was always in the back of my mind. To be honest, I could not handle the drive 5 hours in a car up and down a mountain was not fun at all. I felt like throwing up oh so many times. I just kept eating lemonheads. My doctors said that lemonheads help with the nausea. I am extremely tired and feel out of it. I have the "chemo dark circles' under my eyes and I pray that will go away soon.

Tonight my ABC mini series aired and it was so good. Claire did a great job. Mom cried through the whole thing! Speaking of ABC, Claire called and said that Good Morning America anchor Robin wants to meet me! She is also battle Breast Cancer and heard my story! So I will be flying to New York soon and I am so excited about getting national attention to spread the word on breast cancer in younger woman! I will keep you posted on when I go.

Nothing else new with me, just more and more of my friends are getting in engaged and I am still waiting. I checked the front yard and no money tree was planted so waiting is game. I hate checking Facebook.

Well I am off to bed! Thank you everyone again for all the thoughts and prayers. With your support I am not sure I could do this!

Check the Ta Ta's

Hannah Montana

I know my little cousin Emma Grace will love this post ;) Today after my fifth interview I really feel like Hannah Montana!

My mom school held a mock Relay for Life to raise money for the real walk which is May 2-3. I was asked to come out and start the walk. I was very honored to see all these little (well not all of them are little, some where bigger then me!) 6,7, and 8 graders pay $2 to walk. I know half really just wanted to get out of class but hey that's $2 towards finding a cure! 13WMAZ came out and filmed the walk and interviewed some of mom's teachers, parents, mom, and finally me. I was not prepared for this interviewed and I am really scared I sound stupid! I hope people will catch some of the other media I am in!

For record, I am very honored on all the attention I am getting and thankful I can spread the word on young women can get breast cancer. This brings my total media appearances to 4. I have 2 news casts. and 2 newspapers under my belt. I am now waiting on NBC to call then I would have all of Macon media covered!

Pick up an 11th Hour newspaper, my article is there today. Tonight I will be on 13WMAZ at 5 or 6 pm (they are sure which time slot yet.) Next week starts the ABC special and the promo is airing now.

My Godmother told me last night that I needed an agent! Any takers?

Before I go I have another Granger story! I hear people really enjoy these: Yesterday Brian and I took Granger to the park with some friends and their new lab puppy and wore the two out. When we brought him home my dad was like "don't let that dog in this house, he is dirty and needs a bath." For the record that dog was not dirty, he did roll in mud or step in anything, he was just fine. But anyways we put him out and of course Samford J (my Boston terrier) gets to come in. Well this makes Granger mad. He is out there even at dark! Finally, I get to bring him in just to feed him. My dad takes the trash out and finds a surprise. My dad comes in yelling at me "Look what he did now" You would have thought he ate the deck. He chewed up a mat that goes in front of the grill. It came from the dollar store. I tried to tell my dad its because he sees everyone inside and he is mad. I would be to. My dad lets him stay in and Granger just slept the night away on his bed. Never made a sound. Mom and I both know that he is better in the house then he outside. But my dad will see that!

I am headed to my sister's house this weekend so I don't know if I will get a chance to write. I post the stories when I get home!

Check the Ta Ta's

ZETA #1 (that's all I heard from my sister when she was in college)

Sorry for keep everyone waiting but, this has been a super busy week! On Monday my Godmother came from Tampa to visit me this week while I am on the "healthy" week. I am happy cause this week I have got to eaten real Italian! I have not stop at all and now I feel very tired and I am suppose to go out of town to my sister's this weekend for a wedding. Last night everyone (Dad, Mom, Brian, Linda, and I) headed to GA Tech for a "Cookout for Catherine". The ZTA's of Tech heard my story from my cousin Hallee and wanted to do something. They ended up selling over 200 tickets at just in my honor! It was amazing to meet to a group of women that are passionate about helping others! As I was riding home I thought to myself, I have attended to 2 University and not one has done anything for me, but Tech has done more then enough! Thanks Tech!

Today I had my blood work and all my counts were up and fine so now I can eat fresh things again! I am so excited to eat a salad and fruit! I will have my 3 round of chemo next Thursday which is my half way mark and I thrilled! 3 down 3 to go! I head to Atlanta after that treatment to meet my doctors up there and talk about surgery and reconstruction!

This afternoon, I had a visitor from Ed Grismore. I was very excited to be interviewed by him! Also, got the call that the promo to the ABC interviewed will air tonight at 8:15. The story will air next week at 7 and 11.

Check the Ta Ta's

He did it (no, not that)

This has been one of the best weekends of my life. On Thursday I had the KA Rose Court Dinner and when I got to the house all the brothers had the Breast Cancer Ribbon pins with there Chapter pins on there jackets. I felt like Sally Field, "they like me, they really like me!". On Friday some of my girlfriends came in to do the interview for ABC and they took me to dinner afterwards and it was wonderful getting out of the house and just laughing with them, telling old and new stories and I was thinking as looked at the round table how I could cry cause of the way my friends have come together. After dinner, Crystal, Caroline, Kimberly came home and Caroline baked me a my favorite cake (which my family has ate every bit!) it was like old times! Crystal is on the "I want a wig kick" and she played dress up with one of my wigs and it was so funny! I swore she looked like what she did in high school! For the ones that do not know Caroline D. she has jet black hair with dark eyebrows well put on the red wig and oh my Lord, well the pictures will explain ;) Kimberly had her fun when she went with me to get my wig!

Side note, as I was of course venting on how bad I want to be in engaged, I was stating how Brian had discuss, what do we call ourselves, we are now more then just a boyfriend or girlfriend but not yet fiance, so Crystal being the creative one, says well just call him your Beyfriend (not sure how to spell it) we all just laughed (its one of those you had to be there moments)

Saturday, I had lunch with some of the girls and Brian and then we went and played golf with his best friend and then we cookout with John Paul and Jessica. We had our own Old South!

To the point of this blog, as John Paul and Jessica were leaving last night I notice Samford (my Boston Terrier) was out sniffing the driveway. It was dark and we could figure out what he was doing. I come inside to finish the dishes and Brian comes running in "Oh My Gosh, you will not believe what Granger (our Vizsla, which is a big dog, which my dad HATES) has done!". I go outside and see feathers all over the driveway, at which point my parents are driving up. We knew my dad would go nuts, we tried to scrap the feathers which meant they flew everywhere. All we could do is just laugh! Granger was so proud of himself that he killed a bird in mid air. My dad was OK and lucky just said "well, you got your money's worth." After everyone went inside Brian gave the command to show the bird, and Granger went and got the dead bird. Brian said it was perfect, just like if they were in the woods.

Now, this is Granger game list of hunt that he has done on his own: lizard, squirrel, rabbit, and now a bird. We are waiting for him to bring us a deer. needless to say: HE DID IT!

Well today, I am off to run some errands for mom!

Check the Ta Ta's and your Ovaries (I am spreading the word Lyndsie!)

Just call me Granny

May I first saw if this is what old is going to feel like then I AM NOT EXCITED! I feel like an 84 woman. My joints are killing me. When I walk you can hear my joints cracking. I know gross right, oh the joys of chemo! They saw this will not last long and I am waiting for it to go away.

Tonight, Brian and I went to the Rose Court Dinner for KA and it was so nice to see everyone again. I was really nervous cause it was the first social thing I have done on campus since discovery this wonderful cancer. I was just scared people would not know how to accept me in my wig. I know its silly. We took alot of pictures and I literally soaked up every minute. Everyone made me feel so welcome! Thank you KA and the lovely girls! I can tell me strenght has change just going to eat has made me tired and I can not wait to 11pm to go to bed. (thats my bedtime).

This weekend at 1pm at Stratford there will be a meeting on the Komen 3 day walk that some of my friends are raising money for me to walk in. If you are interesting in attending please let me know. It would mean so much to raise money towards research in saving my life. It will be a great to see me!!!

Because of the meeting most of my girlfriends have come home and I will get to see them! (oh i love meetings ;) Hopefully, Brian and I will stay busy and I will not get upset that I could not go to Old South this weekend!

One more week till I have chemo again and then I will be down to 3!!!

I have the Relay shirts! please let me know if you want one! I have taken some orders all you need to do is come to the house and pick one up!

Check the Ta Ta's

SweetHeart

Sorry for not writing yesterday, I had somewhat of a lazy but full day. I woke up with a very bad soar throat, to the point my dad and grandmother took me to the doctor. Basically they told this will be my illness from now with chemo is the throat and mouth problems! It hurts, but it is WAY better then in the hospital! They sent me home with some medicine that I take every 4 hours. Total that makes 8 pills for me to take! I guess you can say I know how to "pop the pills".

Last night was a good night, my roommate from Mercer came by to let me know that for the 2nd year in a row I was nominated to be on the Kappa chapter of KA of Mercer Rose Court. To some of the girls I know its not a big deal, but when you are fighting for your life and I find joy that someone today thought of someone else and not of themselves, I could not believe it. Why on earth would 27 boys want me to represent them on campus? Well I didn't believe and actually waited till midnight till I heard from 2 of the brothers that it really happened. So thank you KA for giving me something to look forward to! Tomorrow they will have a dinner honoring all the Roses and I am praying that I will be well enough to go! I know I will cry, cause its nice to see everyone again! Also, this weekend the boys will head to Tybee Island for Old South and it just tears me up because this is where Brian and I met! My girlfriends have promise they will call! This is what I was talking about it. The simply things of just giving me title gives my mind such a positive boost its (as my niece would say) amazing!

Today I am really resting I talked to some of my brothers on the phone and they excited for me to try to come. I am really sore with joint pains. I am now waiting on my dad to bring us lunch I am so hungry! (my poor dad!) My grandmother has to go today and I wish she could stay longer but she has her big trip planned to Tocca Falls with her Sunday School friends this weekend! (wish I could go).

Well I am headed back to watch t.v. and stay quiet. Sarah Ruffin is coming to visit me this afternoon along with other people. Thanks to everyone who brighten my day!

Check the Ta Ta's

Can't Sleep!

Good Morning!

Its 6:17 am and I can not sleep. Everyone in my house is getting ready for work and I am just now getting ready for my PJ day! This is week I plan to take things REAL slow and do much of anything because I do not want to be sick like last time! I feel real tired this time but not as "sick". My stomach and chest feel real tight but they saw that is just from all the medicine I have to take before and right after the Chemo. I am so thankfully I am officially at 4 to go. It does not seem it could get here fast enough!

My grandmother is here now to help me this week so I am not by myself! She also brought her good cooking so I know this will be a better time around. I am taking a steroid that makes me eat ATON because I loss to much last time. I don't want to loose to much weight cause then they lower the amount of chemo which means more later down the road and I really like this 4 number! So bring on the bacon Nanny!

This weekend I basically slept. Friday and Saturday were bad days just didn't want to move or do anything. Sunday was a good day. I went to Church and then to lunch and even went to Kroger with my mom. I am on a high protein diet so therefore, we ate a steak but don't to excited mine was dry and rubber cause I cannot have any pink throughout, but it was safe and I ate it!

Today will be a boring day, just lying around watching my TV and eating! I look forward for these days to be over!

More later!

Check the TA TA's

Chemo 2

Today's Chemo went well. I was there from 9:40 to about 4:30. I have lost some weight so therefore my doctor had to reduce the amount of chemo and added more nausea drip so that is why it took so long. Brian and mom went with me along with my fan club which included ABC news affiliate, Stephanie (the photographer who is documenting my journey), along with friends who stopped by on their lunch breaks (Molly, Alex, Mickey, and Sarah). My uncle JP brought everyone lunch which I was very grateful for because I really was getting hungry at that point. I wrote a couple of thank you cards, did a interview with the news, took some pictures, then slept most of the time since I did not sleep much last night.

Delaney Holliman came today and brought me a DVD from my "head shaving party" and WOW they are so good and mean oh so much to me! Stephanie did a GREAT job. She truly captured the moment. I will treasure this set forever. I'm going to be really brave and post a couple on-line through Facebook (it is easier that way)

I feel OK just really tired. This is an all day event. But the nurses took great care of me so I think that has made it easier for me! (thanks Jamie). It was nice to come home to a home cooked meal. Thanks to the YoungLife Committee Leaders, for taking care of me on days of my chemo and everyday you think of me! Brian and I treasures you guys so much.

Tomorrow I will start working out at the Wellness Center with the Cancer fit program at 9:00 am. Then back to the doctors office to get the "after chemo shot" Then I am being interviewed for the news. REMEMBER: this will air starting April 28 and run through May 1.

I have had many people ask what can you do, or how you can help. Well there are several ways. First, a group of girls have put together a Relay for Life team and have made T-Shirts. The slogan is perfect. Fits me to the tee! its Navy shirt with a pocket on the front the says Relay for Life and on the back they put the Chanel C's with at the bottom that says "Cure Catherine" you may purchase one for $15 dollars. Please let me if you are interested and I get you in touch with the girls who are selling them.

Another way Wachovia Bank on Tom Hill Sr. has created an account for me called Cure Catherine and donations may be made. This will help with the unwanted expenses that insurance will not cover. The account number is 2000034559509. This will really help my parents out!

Thank you to everyone who has sent cards, packages, food, and all the prayers. I can not thank you enough. I promise there will be thank you cards coming soon. There just has been a lot on plate so it is taking me some time!!!

Enjoy the pics!

Check the Ta Ta's

PS: Lynn, I am updating my blogg! I just can't do it when I am on a date with the trash can or toliet!!!! love you!

PSS: 2 down, 4 to go!!!!!!

What I really want!

I really want to be engaged. I know that is alot to ask but really I would love to look act something else and plan something else in my life besides this stupid cancer. I am trying to be good cause i know it is tight for Brian right now. I just hard because we both want it and just can't have it right now. I found my ring and I even went back and tried it on today. And yes...I pulled the cancer card to jeweler hoping she would Brian a deal. Well she did but not enough for me to say yes, lets call the church, photographer, girls, and guys. So I will patiently wait some more and read my bride magazines and wish that the Lord will drop that money tree tomorrow (yeah right!)

Chemo is tomorrow at 9:40. I will get there and wait my turn and then the fun begins. Brian took off tomorrow so he will be with me the whole treatment this time. My mom is going along as usually.

My SHHH it a Wig (spicy is her name) came in today and really does look like my old hair. It is the same color and cut so that has made me happy! I will it tomorrow. I am going to try to put some pictures up soon.

The ABC affiliate came today and interviewed me. I will be part of a 5 day story line. I am really excited because I to get the message out there about BRAC and that young women can get cancer too! MY stories will air April 28 the week of Relay for Life. So watch out! Thanks Meghan for setting that up!

Tonight one of my best friend and her family brought food out and praying I can keep it down! It was great to tell old stories and laugh and to be care free. So thanks Caroline! P.S. I missed Oliver he is normally with us when we eat ;)

Well its late and I have a big day tomorrow!

Check the Ta Ta's

New Day

Today was a day like before I had the cancer. I woke up and went to class. This was the first time I had been to class since I was diagnosed. Class was fine it was good to see everyone. It is going to be tough trying to finish the semester since I have been out so much but I will do it.

My head is itching and so I have a different kind of numbing cream for my head. I am now waiting for the little pieces to fall out so I can get over the trauma of not having hair. Not going to lie it is one of the hardest I have had to deal with yet. It is hard for a 21 year old not to have hair. Today I was watching T.V. and I swear a million hair commericals came on, its hair porno for chemo patients! I hate it!

I am starting to vomit alot and it really weird cause it does not hurt I just do it and go on my merry way! Hey least I am losing weight!

Looking forward to Chemo on Thursday. This will be my second treatment and after Thursday only 4 more to go! Then surgery, then DONE!!!!! Chemo starts at 9:40.

Please pray that I do not end up in the hospital again in my Nader period. I do not want to experience that again!

Check the Ta Ta's

Off with my hair!!

Tonight at 8 pm I had a the normal cancer patient shaving head party. I had tons of friends to come out and support me. Cay Kite buzzed what was left of my hair. It was time, my head was tingling and my hair was coming out fast and I was tired of looking in my drink and seeing hair.

Lots of people are wondering if this was a good thing and yes, it was. As Cay said it was time for it to go. I wear my wig and everyone has said you can't tell the difference. My Wig looks like my old hair before I was diagnosedwith breast cancer.

This is a road I never thought I would take. But I can already tell it is making me a more humble person.

I will put pictures up later after I have time to process it.

Check the TA TA's

PS from Sarah Mac: Catherine is the cutest breast cancer patient you have ever seen! And she was a CHAMP tonight. Britney Spears aint got nothin' on her!

so short

Sorry I has taken me forever to write but alot has happened and it makes me sick to sit at a computer. A couple of things:

• I have been in the hospital with a fever of 104.5 and Pneumonia
• I have the BRAC 2 gene
• I will have a double mastectomy and a hysterectomy in August
• My hair is falling out
• I have my next round of Chemo April the 10 (Thursday)

More later......

Check the TA TA's

BRIAAN!!! (all one syllable)

I title this entry as such because you likely have immediately noticed the difference in writing style - that's right lady's and gentleman, boys and girls, little children, dogs and cats - Catherine has given your's truly the password to the blog and the first thing I hear once she reads this is going to, more than likely, be exactly that. Just read the line, sweetheart - BRIAAN!!!

So, as I said, I have been entrusted to task of bringing everyone up to speed since the last entry, which I believe was on the evening that our heroine made her triumphant return home from the port-implantation surgery. Since that time: chemo, feeling like crap, Cookie came to town, the elusiveness of Granger, Easter sunday, back to Cherry Blossomin', and feeling like crap all over again. Here's the details.

On Thursday, Catherine, Holley, Ma Pam and Tavia Henderson (Catherine's voice of guidance thus far), all went to Coliseum for the first round of chemotherapy. She was scheduled to receive her first dose of the nasty little booger they call "The Red Devil" triple cocktail (trust me, this ain't something you used to drink back in your college days). They call the three types of treatment within her chemotherapy the "Red Devil" because, as you likely have already pictured, this thing is a bitch! (Lord, I apologize). Well, I actually went to school this day, but had 1:00-2:30pm scheduled as my planning period, so I scooted my way on over to the dr.'s office just as soon as it hit 1:00pm and actually arrived just as the process was starting. Let me tell you folks, you would have been proud. Our girl was chin up, dressed to impress and just as fiesty as you might have expected. Leaving to head back to school was a definite downer for the both of us, but she took it right in stride and kept right on trucking.

With Mom and Holley there to keep Catherine occupied, she thought she was doing better than ok, until Molly showed up and that just lit up her day. So much in fact that, from what I have heard, as Catherine was coming out of the office back into the waiting area, she saw a young woman who looked as though she was fighting back the tears. Catherine eased towards her and asked politely, "Were you just diagnosed with breast cancer?" The woman managed a nod. And what I am told happened next is just the thing that makes me know more than ever that this struggle nor any other will ever hold our heroine down. She responded saying, "My name is Catherine Carswell and I was diagnosed on February 28th. I just finished my first treatment of chemo. I want you to know that you are going to be alright. God is gonna take care of you." I am not sure just how precise my recollection is, but let me assure you, this is prime cut, Grade A exemplorary of why Catherine is going to beat the brakes off this cancer (metaphorically speaking).

Julie, Tre and Emma Grace were in town and came out to the house Wednesday and Thursday nights. And nearer to midnight on Thursday, Scott and Catie Beth got here as well. I think we are gonna hire Catie Beth out to hospices and nursing homes cause that little girl's presence will most certainly lift your spirits in a heartbeat. She is walking everywhere, doing her Miss I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T thing, and talking up a storm. She tell you what she wants (or does not), when she is ready (or not), and just about every sound that any animal in the zoo or a box of Animal Crackers makes. You should see her go. That girl will be a genius - bet on it.

Friday and Saturday were basically days of recooperation; Catherine got a steriod shot on Friday to help her with overcoming the visciousness of the chemo. But hey, just think, only 3 more weeks until we get to do it all again! (insert Joe Pesci in "Home Alone" style muttled explitive here). Saturday suprised her (not really - she's got books that tell her everything before it actually happens) with the stiffness, soreness and flu-like symptoms typical of the day following a steroid shot. Oh joy, more fun! (addition muttled vulgarity optional).

To add to all this fun, but more for my perspective, Granger decided that the pen, which we put together for him last weekend, was simply far too meager accommodations for him to call home. So he chewed through the chain length fence. Allow me to repeat the verbage their for those with the untrained eye - Granger CHEWED through the chain length fence. How in the world do you even do that? I mean - honestly. So Scott and I spent almost all day Saturday and Sunday working on some new quarters for the master of mischief.

Sunday was Easter and we all went to church - Bubba (Mr. Lee), Gigi (Ms. Pam), Holley, Scott, Cookie (Catie Beth), CatCat (Catherine), Sarah MacConnell (YoungLife leader with Catherine and I and Catherine's voice of female reason) and B (that's me). It was a fanatastic service at the Bowman; Pastor Bob Moon shared the story following Catherine's chemo treatment from above and it nearly put me in tears. I tell ya, this girl nows how to get me. After service, we went to Giuseppi's - no way in Hades we were all getting into Jeanenne's.

Yesterday, Catherine went back to the Cherry Blossom house to get some work done with Ms. Connie, but I am really afraid that in the excitement to have her helper and partner in crime back on the scence, she may have worn ol' Catherine down. So Catherine came on home after lunch and spent the rest of the afternoon yesterday in the bed. This morning she arose with a bit of fever and, as a result, we spent the remainder in the day in the doctor's office. Her port did not seem to allow the nurses to draw blood as they should so we will be back at Coliseum tomorrow morning and try once again.

Sorry, I can not tell you all more, but this is the majority of what I know and I will have to leave the rest of the info up to our girl to fill you in later. It's bed time; narcolepsy is creeping up on me.

Check the Ta-Ta's (or let somebody do it for ya)!

Sincerely,
Brian

PS. This is what part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R were eliminated.

Start Running

Sorry I have not written any thing in a while. I have been super busy and super tired. Monday I went to "Chemo Class" which was hell on earth. The teacher was an old friend's aunt and she was trying to make this easy as possible. I get angry when the nurses are like you should join a support group to get you through this but my next question is are there any in there my age. Of course the responds is oh no sorry. After class I had lunch with Kimberly and her mom and then YES we WENT TOOOOOOO..................SHHHHH ITS A WIG!!!! Oh my Lord that place is a trip! I kid you not you walk into this old shopping center on Mercer University and all these white and black Styrofoam head forms looking you down like buy me!!! Ms Gloria will help you in oh so many ways girlfriend. She said "sit right up here and let me pull some down for you to try on." Oh my Lord I tried on Blonde's, Reds (I find out that I looked like Jen Marshall!), even black with highlights. What an experience. She put the stalking cap on my head which was a huge step for me. I actually took the steps to see what I looked like with my bald head. I cried a bit its shocking, it really is. But i know this is how God wanted me to show my true beauty. I found wig and its my same hair color.

Sarah Baker Bennett one of Holley's girlfriends that she graduated with at Westside and also was ZTA (philanthorty was Susan G. Komen) cut my wig exactly like my hair now. We ended up cutting a few inches off so that way it will not be so dramatic coming out. I now have the Katie Holmes bob. She did it all out of love and support for me and family and cannot thank her enough!

Yesterday went to pick up Holley at the Airport on our way into Buckhead. Here are some funny stories of the night. Parking with dad is interesting we park at the top of the building away from everyone else even though we were only 1 hour to get sis ( we really didn't want any one messing with the car.) We walk 30 miles just to meet. Once we get her and back in the Van off up 400 we go. We passed the sign outside of the Airport that said "WELCOME TO GA, SONNY PURDUE GOVERNOR BLAH BLAH" with out a quick in her step mom goes "Where have we been?, I thought we never left GA!" Oh my you laugh it out . Then we were driving to find something to eat at 10 at night so we went to the Buckhead dinner thinking it was going to be an I-HOP or Waffle House. Not so much of the case. It was white table clothes, 7 star meals. Got back to the Hampton Inn ( cause only were my dad will stay) We were all unloading our bags when I made the comment---"I carry my bags dad" Mom so quick with jokes, says "BAGSDAD" get it? WOW this is what cancer does to you when you and your family has not sleep! I did not sleep at all that night way to nervous about getting my port.

Wednesday morning arrives and I am getting ready to go to the Northside Hospital, I decided that I would out smart the nurses and pre drug myself up and that way I can get there they get put the IV in and we will be smooth sailing! Holley numbs my veins in the inside of my elbows we cover them up and take my Valium and I think I am jamming!

Not so much the nurse prances in there and says will that was cute but sweaty I have to put the IV in your hand not arm because they might have to move your arm in order to get the port in right. Bloody Hell, just I as thought this was going to be nothing they try my right arm and nothing works, then they stick me again in the left and finally works after 3 more Valium, numbing cream, and sniffing salt we got in! Whew! I don't remember anything after that.

I woke in recovery nausea as hell. The funny part about the whole thing is that my recovery nurse made me a care package with cute small pillows that I have to use under my arms while sleeping, and (I don't remember this next part but my mom told me it was really funny) then she pulls out this big fluffy soft lion and I yelled "Sir Fidel", Sir Fidel is here" and my mom said no honey its courage the cancer lion and said no that ADPi he is Sir Fidel. that poor nurse...even when I am unconscious I still have them on my heart! Thank you to the Chapter at Southern for praying for me in these difficult times! would to come down and meet the ones I don't know!

Tomorrow is a really scary day. I start Chemo at 11:20. Its a 4 drip and can not tell you the emotions me and my whole family are going there. My mom and my sister are going with me while Scott and Catie Beth will drive down tomorrow night so that way we can spend Easter together.

Well here we go. Its officially starting tomorrow. No looking back, but running forward. My life has now changed forever. Please be with me and my whole family.

Check the Ta Ta's